There's nothing a Welshman likes more than a captive audience, and so it proved last Friday when I attended as a guest (modesty prevents me from disclosing whether I was a guest of honour) a dinner to celebrate the opening of the Hong Kong chapter of the Institute of Chartered Accountants of England and Wales.
The local speakers, including James Lee, head of the Hong Kong chapter, were brief, self-deprecating and witty. Lee also put on a Welsh accent every time he referred to the main speaker, one Martyn Jones, head of the ICAEW. Taking the piss out of your guest speaker: I like it.
Unfortunately, Jones the Drone did not drop his own Welsh accent; nor was he either brief or witty. Not a single titter did he raise, at least not for the right reasons. Tittered we not. Nor was he even accurate, referring to his own institute several times as the ICW. Institute of Cardiff Windbags, perhaps? He also referred to Hong Kong as a country.
Instead, he got caught in a loop of referring to the similarities between Hong Kong and the UK, and the virtuous feedback between service and success, and back again, round and round. He put the 'numb' into number cruncher. The virtuous feedback when he finally sat down was more in the nature of relief than appreciation.
Come back Neil Kinnock - all is forgiven.